All by myself, don't wanna be all by myself.

I miss my friends.

I miss those college days when your best friends were just a couple doors away. As I got older, and friends got married and moved away, I was still fortunate to have a large enough circle that, there was always at least one good friend that was close enough to grab a slice of pizza with and chat about our day. Stick a fork in it, those days are done.

It’s official now, all my close friends are gone. This past weekend my last, close, local, friend moved away with her husband to the suburbs. I am now all alone.

As a mom, most of the time you barely have enough room in your schedule for your husband, but knowing you have the ability to meet a friend, even in you are never able to take advantage of it, is a comfort. Talking with friends on the phone, is how you have most of your contact with them, so the move doesn’t really make that much of a difference, but, yet it does. In your mind, with them close by, you still feel like that carefree, single college kid who hung out with her friends whenever she felt like it. However, when they leave, you slowly begin to realize, that you are not that single girl in the dorms anymore and that is probably why your mom isn’t totally freaking out that you’re living and {gasp} sleeping with a man.

It’s hitting me hard this week because of the Sex and the City movie coming out – the ultimate chick flick. I used to watch the television show with close friends when we were single and we had an amazing time. None of those good friends live near me anymore. Who am I going to go to the movie with now? Dear husband is hoping and praying that I meet and click with someone new before Saturday night, so he doesn’t have to become my new girlfriend for this movie viewing.

Why can’t my life be a little more like sex and the city? Those girls were so different from each other, in different stages in their lives and yet they always managed to find time to hang out together. Granted, you rarely saw them actually working, cleaning their homes or any other number of mundane daily chores but they made their friendship a top priority. They went clubbing together, out to breakfast or to some art museum and still had time to get married, have a baby and battle breast cancer. Those women achieved a balance in their lives. Bet you that someone, Carrie, Miranda, Samantha or all three would go out with Charlotte to the movies, she wouldn’t have to drag poor Harry, like I have to drag dear husband. The fantasy of TV land is so appealing.

Charlotte uttered a line to the other three girls in an episode of sex and they city that so resonated with me when I was single and dating, that still holds true: "Don't laugh at me, but maybe we can be each other's soul-mates? And then, we could let men be just these great, nice guys to have fun with."

I love my husband, he is my best friend, but my girls, my close knit group of friends, are my soul-mates. Only another girl can understand menstrual cramps and labor pains. Only another girl understands how depressing it is to gain five pounds and how much more depressing it is to try to lose 10 pounds when eating about that 5 pound weight gain caused it to double. There are no real replacements for Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte or Samantha in each other’s lives. They can meet other people who they can hang out with but they will never be their soul mates. My close friends, and you know who you are, there is no replacing you.

Don’t laugh at me guys but, when I do finally see the movie with dear husband, I’ll be seeing it with him, but I’ll be pretending I am seeing it with you.